The Infomercial


You are looking at me with

empty brown eyes that want

to grasp me whole. and own

so i politely, rudely (it

depends on which of us is

more convincing) ignore you.

implore you to leave me. let

me go. but no, with your strong

hands you cut off my breath

and i am floating away out of

my person. my name is no

longer Elizabeth. I am no one’s

daughter. I have no sisters to

like or dislike. I do not read

Nabokov, Miller or Rowling (I

actually don’t read Rowling).

There are no contacts in my

phone. I am not a bored office

worker. I do not play at Banana

-grams, Sims, or sex. she does

not sleep. she is not me. But i

watch what you do to her.

Removing her sweater.

removing the pants.

removing the bra.

touching the breast.

touching the vagina.

touching yourself.

forcing yourself in.

forcing yourself off.

forcing it.

insisting upon that mouth.

insisting upon that rear.

insisting into it forcefully.

and it’s not me.

it’s not me.

it’s not me.

it’s not me.



Built for your pleasure.

built without wants.

built with three holes.

built in lubrication in two.

very life-like, can be trained

to fight back or give in,

if you insist. Can take

multiple hits: Mild impact

during regular use, severe

impact during infrequent

use. you can use force.


-like. In brown, sepia, sunlight

and alabaster. easy to clean

with soap and water. lifetime

guarantee. trade in older models

for credit toward a newer

younger models, depending on

care. buy now and the second

time around will be easier!

all you pay

is shipping

and handling.