The Infomercial

I.

You are looking at me with

empty brown eyes that want

to grasp me whole. and own

so i politely, rudely (it

depends on which of us is

more convincing) ignore you.

implore you to leave me. let

me go. but no, with your strong

hands you cut off my breath

and i am floating away out of

my person. my name is no

longer Elizabeth. I am no one’s

daughter. I have no sisters to

like or dislike. I do not read

Nabokov, Miller or Rowling (I

actually don’t read Rowling).

There are no contacts in my

phone. I am not a bored office

worker. I do not play at Banana

-grams, Sims, or sex. she does

not sleep. she is not me. But i

watch what you do to her.

Removing her sweater.

removing the pants.

removing the bra.

touching the breast.

touching the vagina.

touching yourself.

forcing yourself in.

forcing yourself off.

forcing it.

insisting upon that mouth.

insisting upon that rear.

insisting into it forcefully.

and it’s not me.

it’s not me.

it’s not me.

it’s not me.

 

II.

Built for your pleasure.

built without wants.

built with three holes.

built in lubrication in two.

very life-like, can be trained

to fight back or give in,

if you insist. Can take

multiple hits: Mild impact

during regular use, severe

impact during infrequent

use. you can use force.

life

-like. In brown, sepia, sunlight

and alabaster. easy to clean

with soap and water. lifetime

guarantee. trade in older models

for credit toward a newer

younger models, depending on

care. buy now and the second

time around will be easier!

all you pay

is shipping

and handling.

Sip

Come here boy, my bitter cup of coffee

awake aromatic senses as I sip slowly your letters ‘bout love, lips, and sin

as my breath, boy, meets your fire, heating my desire, I feel your touch in my gut dispersing through my body, boy, like desperate darts, dashing by danger signs. Read More

On Lowering “Misogynoiristic Expectancy” from a Gay Black Man’s Standpoint

In light of his phenomenal piece on Model View Culture, in which he broke down the ways in which online interactions almost always ends badly for the Black women and femmes involved due to the realities of hypervisibility and a plain ole “Open Season” that never seems to truly end (among other factors), I sit in awe of Riley H. and wonder what I can do to chill the f**k out and back the f**k up with regards to my online interactions with Black femme folk. Read More

skin, queer brown muddy kid,

Skin

From the age my eyes grew ears, I can remember my mind associating anything to do with our bodies with skin. There were no arms, no legs, no face structure or elbow joints- just skin. Everyone became a colour, ascribed to them so carelessly by me, and that was all they were. “You are brown muddy boy”. “You are pale pink girl”. “He is porcelain white”. And that was all there was. I didn’t see the depth in their eyes, the dips in their soul or the grit in their teeth- just their skin. Travis Alabanza, a self-defined “muddy brown boy”, at the age of 8- defined bodies by their skin. Read More

queer prism rainbow white light

Finding the White Witch In Queer and Trans Youth of Color

The color white is often referred to as the source of pureness, cleansing, hope, and good… while the color black has been synonymous with evil, filth, and corruption. Keep in mind this is a certain type of thinking, which doesn’t necessarily make it everyone’s truth. Many people uphold the color black as a core of equality and strength, and in the same breath will hold white to malevolence, dullness, and oppression. Even more so, there are people who think both black and white work together as agents of love. The only reason I mention this is to point out my own struggle with the term “white witch” and how I came to use the term in my day to day work. Read More

shifting seas, seen(s) and scenes

i get misgendered but also misraced. if “gendering” a person involves applying a gender assumption  like man or woman, then “race-ing” a person involves applying a radicalized assumption like black, white, asian, native and so on. “misraced” refers to the act of making a falsified racialized assumption. often i am misunderstood, misinterpreted and misplaced. i am racially identified to be ethnically misaligned and gender assigned to be temporarily displaced. Read More